Chop Chop

Not too long ago... at a race circuit just around the corner... ... And so we come to the greatest DVD of our time. It's called "Bagpuss: The Director's cut" and has nothing at all to do with the DVD we're giving away here. No, this is a far shoddier affair featuring, as it does, a documentary, or - if you will - a mockumentary. Revealing how the staff of Superbike manages to cobble together the best sports bike magazine in the world every month. It's all here - the road tests, the track action, the long-termer bike tests, the centerfold shoots, big Al's baking tips, well, maybe not those but we'll talk about everything else. Citizen Kane? Battleship Potemkin? Dude, where's my car? They are all unquestionably far, better, films than this - but do they feature some of the finest motorcycles ever built? No, they do not. This DVD will fill in the gaps so disappointingly evident in the works of Messers Wells, Einstein, and Leiner.

Jackass Number Two is a compilation of various stunts, pranks and skits, and essentially has no plot. Chris Pontius, Johnny Knoxville, Steve-O, Bam Margera, and the whole crew return to the screen to raise the stakes higher than ever before.

The story of two teenage extraterrestrial refugees from the planet Pluto, who escape to Earth after their planet is destroyed by the US government, as it was deemed “insignificant.” For many years prior, tensions between the Plutonians and the Earthlings had seen a steady incline, as Pluto held camps where Earthlings were experimented on and tortured. The two aliens make their crash landing, undertake human form and undergo the aliases “Hugh Jainus” and “E. Rection”. In an effort to wage revenge on the nation, with their brainwashed sidekick Potator under their wing, the trio hijack television stations worldwide and broadcast mind-numbingly stupid and ridiculous, yet insane and often violent programs to dumb down and distract the nation’s citizens from their devious plans. The tube tells the story...

Ritchie Spencer and his friends have a problem. They are the only four members of their fraternity, and they are all graduating. They must find a way to bring in more members before they leave, and dodge their way around the rival jock fraternity.

Lloyd and Harry are two men whose stupidity is really indescribable. When Mary, a beautiful woman, loses an important suitcase with money before she leaves for Aspen, the two friends (who have found the suitcase) decide to return it to her. After some "adventures" they finally get to Aspen where, using the lost money they live it up and fight for Mary's heart.

To test its top-secret Human Hibernation Project, the Pentagon picks the most average European-Americans it can find - an Army private and a prostitute - and sends them to the year 2505 after a series of freak events. But when they arrive, they find a civilization so dumbed-down that they're the smartest people around.

The crew have now set off to finish what as left over from Jackass 2.0, and in this version they have Wee Man use a 'pee' gun on themselves, having a mini motor bike fracas in the grocery mall, a sperm test, a portly crew member disguised as King Kong, as well as include three episodes of their hilarious adventures in India.

Valentin, the general supervisor of a sub-prefecture cram school, has a strange power: all he has to do is wish for a certain person to turn into a bird, and the metamorphosis takes place and his victims grow wings. He's in love with Sylvie, the young lady coveted by all the local males. This is how an entire small population loses its human appearance.

He's Ace Ventura: Pet Detective. The Ace is on the case to find the Miami Dolphins' missing mascot and quarterback Dan Marino. He goes eyeball to eyeball with a man-eating shark, stakes out the Miami Dolphins and woos and wows the ladies. Whether he's undercover, under fire or underwater, he always gets his man… or beast!

Toftlund-Holst, the tranquil place on the Baltic Sea, just before Christmas: everything could be so contemplative, but the mood in the Torkelsen house is cloudy. The lease of the restaurant "Four Mermaids" expires and the new owner Nick Winter does not want to extend it ...