Outs and Ins

While recovering in a hospital, war hero Jefferson Jones grows familiar with the "Diary of a Housewife" column written by Elizabeth Lane. Jeff's nurse arranges with Elizabeth's publisher, Alexander Yardley, for Jeff to spend the holiday at Elizabeth's bucolic Connecticut farm with her husband and child. But the column is a sham, so Elizabeth and her editor, Dudley Beecham, in fear of losing their jobs, hasten to set up the single, childless and entirely nondomestic Elizabeth on a country farm.

A weak con man panics when he learns he's going to prison for fraud. He hires a mysterious martial arts guru who helps transform him into a martial arts expert who can fight off inmates who want to hurt or love him.

Luther Heggs, a typesetter for the town newspaper, pitches an idea for a story about a local haunted house where a famous murder/suicide occurred 20 years earlier. After the editor assigns Luther to spend one night alone in the mansion, Heggs has a number of supernatural encounters and writes a front page story that makes him a hometown hero...until the nephew of the deceased sues him for libel.

A bumbling Paris policeman is doggedly determined to capture the master thief that repeatedly eludes him, even when they're the last two men on Earth.

When the young Austrian couple oversleeps, the imminent arrival of the girl's parents creates a stress situation that turns into slapstick and chaos.

Sportswriter Andy Farmer moves with his schoolteacher wife Elizabeth to the country in order to write a novel in relative seclusion. Of course, seclusion is the last thing the Farmers find in the small, eccentric town, where disaster awaits them at every turn.

Two hapless explorers lead an ill-fated 1804 expedition through the Pacific Northwest in a hopeless, doomed effort to reach the Pacific Ocean before Lewis and Clark.

Clark Can't gets into a dangerous situation with his abusive adoptive father Jonathan Can't.

When a shopping mall is taken over by a gang of organized crooks, it's up to a mild-mannered security guard to save the day.

Two bumbling service station attendants are left as the sole beneficiaries in a gangster's will. Their trip to claim their fortune is sidetracked when they are stranded in a haunted house along with several other strangers.

Snub, the delivery man, and his assistant, Sunny, are returning from a delivery when they almost run over a lost woman. After she asks for directions, they accompany the woman to a dance school, where Snub is mistaken for the new professor.

A clumsy and oblivious burglar breaks into the home of a man who is holding a millionaire's daughter for ransom.